The air is fresh
The screech of the calm is the only thing audible
A decibel so low, but not as I
See, I have had my fair share of blows but none to be proud of
No fair maidens that would care to dance forever
Such short comings and such short lives
The door has been slammed numerous times
I must find a new opening, a fresh start
A sunrise to a new life happens this morning
And a sunset to my past
The air is fresh
The ticket to that new life is in my grasp
Holding on to the only thing I have control of
I clutch my bags and keep my foot forward
Forget feelings or disease, I have a plane to catch
I just need to get away from it all, look
I’m having my foes all shook
But read the words in the bathroom like its a stall book
Luckily, my identity ain’t what y’all took
Cause if it was I wouldn’t even write a small hook
I’d be too busy with talking of how I drink a lot
And how I run my city, the others never seem to trot
I know I’m crispy but miss me with all the scheming plots
And all the judgment and separation, man it just needs to stop
Who are you to decide what is cool today
Saying that it’s not me all because I watch some anime?
Who are you kidding, you know you loved that shit growing up
But now you worry bout being cool and throwing up
Oh yeah that’s really tough
I guess you have to get all the attention cause at home you didn’t get enough
I’m in the wrong too, I know I’m not perfect
I turn down girls cause I don’t think that they deserve me
I mean, they’re nice but I can’t allow it
She sayin that she fell for me while I don’t even trip about it
What if I lower my standards, I mean I have before
But it’s gotten so bad that I can’t even have a whore
In my bedroom, nah I ain’t that lucky
I’m at the point in my life when there’s nothing that they can take from me
Which makes me strong yet I’m sitting here feeling weak
My minds flooded with ideas, all it took was a leak
But people will hate even if you have talent
So every verse I write, I make sure it can’t be challenged
I’d like a girl, one that I can just kick it with
But most of them just don’t have the mind to get with me
They’d rather get heartbroken and start choking
On their words, she realized that her friends weren’t joking
It started good, they would talk on the phone
But would have another episode like attack of the clones
That’s not right, i’d treat them so much better
But they take one look at me and can’t see us together
That’s just something on top of other stuff
I’m mad knowing I’m not popular like my brother was
My mom is strict as hell, and listens to church all the time
I’m 18, but doesn’t trust when I say that I’ll be fine
I just wanna be free, I just wanna be lucky
Want them to see what I see, and for a girl to fuck me
I wish I’d go to the parties, I’d turn into an advocate
I wish I’d have some dough without having to need the shit
I’m not running from fate, won’t flee from it
I like my life, I just don’t fully agree with it
Can I have a new life?
Can my spirit leave this body and start anew?
Can I find a bone in my body worthy of existence?
The greener grass?
The illuminated end?
Shall I stay I’m darkness?
Shall I stay praying to something that won’t listen?
Shall I remain hopeful during these struggles?
Shall I choose to leave it all behind in one fatal second?
Everyone knows I can…
What goes on in my mind constantly
Why must everything be so difficult for me? Why must everything be so frustrating? Why can’t things just go my way for a change?